Relax, You're on holiday! Here's our travel tips
1. THEY DO SELL BALLS WHERE YOU’RE GOING
Save yourself the last-minute drama of transferring a dozen Pro V1s into your hand luggage because you are 1.4kg over your allowance. You’re going on a golf trip, you’re not going to the moon. And, should you be besieged by the shanks on your dream holiday, then you can always buy some more. Not ideal, but neither is ferrying 60 balls to cover all bases for your four rounds.
2. BE SURE TO TAKE YOUR FAITHFUL 7-WOOD
It remains one of life’s curiosities how people whine and moan about having to pay to take their trusty clubs along with them — more for the peace of mind rather than the expense. Why would you want to take on the best course that Morocco has to offer without your favourite driver, whose settings you have been messing about with for the previous four months? Golfers are rubbish when they’ve got a ready-made excuse and a surprisingly high kick-point on your rented big dog isn’t going to make for a happy holiday.
3. THERE’S NO NEED FOR ANY APPAREL SCRIPTING
Yes, we like to look our best but the chances are, with the best will in the world, you will be golfing with the same person for each of the four rounds and Derek isn’t going to care too much about your appearance by the time round two comes around. You know you can’t help yourself when it comes to some holiday shopping so leave a bit of room in the case for that garish T-shirt that you’ve convinced yourself looks good with a tan. And there’s no need to take your waterproofs ‘just in case’.
4. GO EASY ON THE PAPERWORK
Our friends in Turkey (or wherever) deal with holidaymakers on a daily basis so don’t put a dampener on your trip by panicking about tee times and shuttles. There’s always one, generally from the UK and with knee-high socks, who is waving around a flurry of print-outs, housed in a plastic folder, with details of his rounds and 10 per cent discounts. Take a look behind you in the check-in queue at our Scandinavian friends who are more relaxed, smile more easily, dress better and have an email copy to hand on their phone. Try to be more like them.
5.I’M SORRY TO BREAK THIS TO YOU BUT…IT’S STILL YOU
The sun will shine, your knees will be out and there won’t be a breath of wind. Plus you’ve been to the range three times in the past fortnight so there’s no reason why this won’t be the week of weeks. Except you’ve been playing golf
for 32 years and it’s generally pretty much the same experience: soaring highs interspersed with the same swing malfunctions that have been present since you were 12. There’s no reason why the 4-iron is all of a sudden going to start fizzing through the thin air. Give yourself a break, have a beer from the cart. I know you don’t normally (your timing and pre-shot routine suffers) but this is different. Play a different format, join up with the two ball behind, live a little.